Hillary Clinton: Where's She Been and What's She Been Doing?

Fashion & Politics
One Sunny Day in New Hampshire
by Suzette

Oh, she's back - she's back! We missed ya, Hillz. And OMG they've got matching outfits! They're ready for a couples competition in ballroom dance or a Sonny & Cher road show. Everybody sing:

[HIM:] They say I'm young - my ears are big.
At least I'm not a blue pant-suited pig.
[HER:] I think I know how you stay thin.
Did you get here by riding on a Schwinn?

Bar.

The answer to what Hillary's been doing all this time seems to be fairly apparent - she's been packing on the hip meat and she grew a little pooch, too while she was at it. Maybe that's the underlying cause of her "campaign" debt - the bills for all that arugula started rolling in.

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The presumptive nominee checks out the rear view to see if it's any better and presumes that it was more like a gallon of ice cream, a bottle of Hershey's Chocolate Syrup and a spoon. Every night.

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In a belated bit of political fence-mending, BO attempts a conciliatory gesture aimed at Muslim American voters. By placing his coat over Hillary's head, he can prove to Muslim voters that he's got nothing against covered-up women.In this case, he prefers it that way.

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Bill is not the only Clinton who wants their ass kissed by Obama. Hillary waits while Barack indicates he's rather choke himself with his tie. There's not enough angry old lady voters in the country to make that happen.

Scenes From A Campaign:

• Unity, N.H., is not just small, it's small and out-of-the-way. For the attendees, the choice of location would be a nightmare.
• the Obama campaign went to great lengths to separate the media from the crowd, deliberately making it difficult for reporters to interview attendees
• It was a hot day, nearly 90 degrees, and there was no shelter.
• thousands of attendees stood in the downpour awaiting thier bus
• It had become apparent by the end of the day that the campaign really hadn't given any thought to the comfort of the people it had bused in.

"The poor folks who gave up an entire day of their lives to see this event got sunburned, dehydrated, then soaked all so Obama could have his symbolic unification rally in this remote town.It was also ironic that the campaign that has made so much out of promising the swift and orderly withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq could not even manage an exit strategy for Unity, N.H." Andrew Cline, The American Spectator

by Suzette

Want more Suzette? Check out some recent posts from Cripes! Suzette: * Sometimes, All I Want is a Baloney Sandwich * Cultural Illiteracy

images: Cripes! Suzette; zorpia
Source: One Sunny Day in New Hampshire